Audio · Poem · Poetry

Shadow Soul

Shadow Soul, You are part of me,

Made of doubts that fall from clouds

Cast over my heart.

You are an orphan

Raised without touch

And never kissed.

You met your praise

In a slap.

And grief is the gravy

Of your past.

 Your words are daggers

I must dodge;

And from my Soul,

I must dislodge.

Your eyes are green; your pockets, empty.

Of ice and stone, you have plenty.

How can I cast you out

But to heal your pain,

For it is my pain?

I made you all that you are.

So it is – I have to say,

I forgive you, Shadow Soul.



Copyright © 2017 Barbara Harris Leonhard




Audio · Poem · Poetry


Grief is ice.
Anger is fire.
Fear is boiling oil.

Aging is a slow death.
Feeling outmoded.
Feeling regretful.
Feeling guilty.
Feeling fearful.

Maybe it doesn’t matter.
Why do I care;
Who cares.
I ask for clarity and energy.

What matters is you.
Just be happy.
These are mole hills, not mountains.
Can’t bring back love.
Can’t fix everything.
Can’t outdo.
Can’t worry about recognition.
Can’t worry about inequity.
It’s not important.
It’s their blindness.
Just be grateful.

What makes me angry?
Am I letting go of the past?

Another shell breaks open for new life.
Growth emerges after fire.

I recall in times of despair, they said, why aren’t you angry?
I held it in selfishly. I couldn’t speak or cry out.
Why would it matter. Really.
If I shouted and screamed.
As much as I tried, I couldn’t.

I beg, please lift this darkness.
There’s too much to do other than what I’m supposed to do.
There’s too much loss with more on the way.
Is this life? Am I wrong to be concerned?
I’m angry and sad.
I’m ready to let go of it. But how?
It doesn’t end.

You counted the Mala beads.
This is a process. Just be patient. You did ask for this.
Seeking forgiveness in all lifetimes
Seeking gratitude in all lifetimes
Letting go of anger in all lifetimes
Healing curses in all lifetimes
Curing pain in all lifetimes
Seeking grace in all lifetimes
These are all gifts
Not burdens.
You chose to release the shadows.

It’s searing
Like the sun is inside of me
A blazing fire
I scream to the deaf.

It’s a cleansing
With the Light.
And so it is.


Copyright © 2017 Barbara Harris Leonhard

Image: Kingdom of Sorrow








Audio · Haiku · Poem · Poetry

Falling Tears

Clearly no ill will

just a careless slight of hand

catching falling tears


Copyright © 2017 Barbara Harris Leonhard