Our Tears Bent the Sun

My Zoom book launch went very well, but unfortunately it wasn’t recorded. Therefore, we won’t have a YouTube video. If you look back through my posts, I have one with links to four audio recordings from the book, and I’m considering making some short videos for YouTube, which I will share.

You can find that post here. https://extraordinarysunshineweaver.blog/2022/10/08/audio-of-4-poems-from-three-penny-memories-and-invite-to-our-zoom-launch-party-on-october-15/

The reading was so well attended that I wasn’t able to see everyone. If you attended, will you let me know in the comment section so that I can thank you. I’m so humbled by the response!

Among those I saw were family and friends. Some of my family hadn’t heard the poems yet unless they listened to the audio I recorded for this blog. Memoirists sometimes fear their family members’ reactions. What I shared was revealing, and I was concerned that they would feel uncomfortable. However, as I wrote this collection, I knew that to heal, I had to reveal. And I believe that when we face our shadows, we heal our ancestors. Carl Jung wrote that what we repress rises out of us as anger. And Maya Angelo wrote, “There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story.” What we bury is passed along as trauma to others.

Having lived with my poems since mom passed in 2016 and having crafted and re-crafted them, I feared they may have lost their magic, their power, their compassion. I worried that my delivery would be flat. My inner critic had fun with me!

Excited about the reading, I didn’t sleep much. I decided not to “wing it” at the reading. I got out of bed and improved my rough outline. Once the reading started, I suddenly felt very emotional. Although I had read some poems to small groups of friends, I felt vulnerable. The poems are very personal, honest, and revealing.

I choked and said I wasn’t sure I could read the poems, but I did tearfully and emotionally do so. I heard and saw others gasping and crying. I felt held in compassion and love. Afterwards, people shared their moving and powerful reactions. I had touched their hearts because we all know grief and loss. We all know how protective we are of our vulnerable loved ones. We all know we will be orphaned, widowed, abandoned by those who pass away. They leave caverns to fill. We recover by being brave and failing to witness the grief that arises as a storm and then recedes like the arching waves before the tsunami hits again.

That’s life, we say. Crying won’t bring anyone back. Or anything – the lost job, the lost friend, the lost home. In my poetic memoir, I wanted to share my story, to witness my grief with compassion. I feel people saw into my heart. I felt held in their love and empathy, cleansed by our tears.

One of my friends announced that my book was already #100 of the new releases on Amazon in Family Poetry. After the reading, I planned to go to bed, but I’m happy that I stayed up to watch the sales. The book hit #1 in New Releases in Family Poetry! That meant it was #6 in the best-seller list in that category. Later it dropped to #10. As people are still buying the book, the sales will vary, so it’s like watching the stock market.

What really matters is my connection to you. Thank you all for your support and love! I’m humbled and grateful!

I failed to get a screen shot of the #6 best-selling ranking, but here is the #10 one.