Extraordinary Sunshine Weaver

I was so honored and thrilled that the esteemed Chines scholar and poet Yongbo Ma surprised me with a translation of a poem from my book Three-Penny Memories: A Poetic Memoir. Yongbo’s bio follows the poem.

“The Caregiver’s Craft” in Chinese….

《照护者的手艺》

妈妈，我只是个凡人，
在照顾你时追求完美。
编织着纱线，就像你

教了又教。我总是
忘记练习。你说我的脑袋
总是埋在书里。

我把钩针固定在
每一行的节奏中，
把你关爱的颜色妥善安放。

数着针脚，
就像诗歌的韵律。
收针。钩出我的诗行。

每一针都是一个念头，一段记忆，一个发现。
我为你编织的是什么？
舒适还是混乱？

一切都会顺利吗？
我研究着这件作品，
满意地看着。有些行

显示出对称，
形式的连贯。我陶醉于
那技艺的精湛，色彩的清晰

仿佛我已钩住了
光辉。但有些行
像溪流一般蜿蜒，

绕过岩石。
有些行里的线索，是杂草，
纠缠在过去绝望的泥泞中。

那些需要遗忘的记忆。
那些本不该说出口的话。
那些出了问题的计划。

断续的梦。减退的希望。
仿佛抓住这支钩针
就能削弱我的思维，我的爱。

妈妈，我要去哪里？
我做对了吗？
你的照护和福祉？

做一个关爱的女儿。令人气馁。
我只是一个凡人，
正在解开我们的结。

Now in English….

The Caregiver’s Craft

I’m only a human, Mom,
seeking perfection in my care for you.
Weaving the yarn, like you taught

and retaught. I keep forgetting
to practice. You say my head
is always in my books.

I anchor my hook
into a rhythm in each row,
putting the colors of your care in place.

Counting the stitches,
like the meter in a poem.
Casting off. Crocheting my lines.

Each stitch a thought, a memory, a discovery.
What am I crafting for you?
Comfort or chaos?

Will everything turn out?
I study the creation, 
pleased. Some rows 

proclaim symmetry,
coherence to form. I revel 
in the virtuosity, clarity of hue

as though I have hooked 
into radiance. But other rows 
meander like a stream,

wandering around the bed rocks.
Threads in some rows, weeds, 
tangled in the mud of past despair.

Memories to be forgotten.
Words that should have been
left unsaid. Plans gone awry.

Fitful dreams. Diminished hope. 
As though gripping this hook 
cripples my thinking. My loving.

Where am I heading, Mom?
Do I have it right yet?
Your care and wellbeing?

Being a doting daughter. Daunting.
I’m only a human
unraveling our knots. 
                  Copyright Barbara Leonhard

Yongbo Ma was born in 1964. He has a PhD and is a translator, editor, and leading scholar of postmodern poetry. He has authored or translated more than 80 published books. Ma is a professor in the Faculty of Arts and Literature at Nanjing University of Science and Technology. His translations from English include works by Walt Whitman, Emily Dickinson, Ezra Pound, Wallace Stevens, W.C.Williams, John Ashbery, Herman Melville and others. You can follow him on Facebook. https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100093276516900.

Three-Penny Memories: A Poetic Memoir

Her uncle asks, Do you love your mother? Can a daughter doubt her love for her mother who is navigating Alzheimer’s? Can she learn to love the stranger her mother is becoming? 

Amazon Best-Selling Author, Three-Penny Memories: A Poetic Memoir (EIF-Experiments in Fiction, 2022), Pushcart Nominee (2022, 2023); Facebook: Barbara Harris Leonhard /barbara.leonhard; Instagram: @meelosmom123; Twitter/X, @BarbaraLeonhar4