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Broken Womb, Shattered Soul: Living with Infertility (part 3)

The final section of my article on infertility is up on Phoebe,MD: Medicine + Poetry. Links to the other sections are provided. I am grateful to Phoebe and her beautiful site for being a major part of my journey with memoir writing.

Phoebe, MD: Medicine + Poetry

By Barbara Leonhard | Featured Contributor


[Click forPart 1andPart 2]

The bandage torn
From new flesh
Releases wails
The wound still
Imbibes air
The scab hides
deep repair
Let it rest. Wait
In time the scar
Records a fate

I learned that healing is a deep process. We may heal a physical wound, but to become whole, we need to heal emotionally, spiritually, and mentally. We need to dig into the old grout of our deep being. Moreover, we must trust help is available.

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Healing · Original Digital Art · Poem · Poetry · Reiki

Dolphin

 

Though the seas rage green,

You breathe into each wave,

Riding the vast, fearless,

Sinking into the primordial dimensions

Of creative surge

With child-like wonder,

Playful and joyous.

Instinct seeks its tribe.

Together, you are valiant in battle,

Guarding and protecting

Even the stranger.

Your laughter, a lifeline

For those lost to peace,

Gasping for salvation in the turmoil

Of stormy swells.

How your eyes dance with trust

As your body strikes through

The angry waves

As though saying,

 “Fear not, Friend.

We can lift you up and

Carry you into the gaze

Of the Pleiades, where

You may be swaddled in the arms of

The daughters of Pleione

And cleansed of dust from old Earth

And set to bloom in the Spring.

May you heal and be strong.

May you too be a beacon and

Your heart, the sonar steering sailors

Out of storm and leading the lost

To safe ground.

May you be that joy,

That joy of grace.”

 

 

©Barbara Harris Leonhard @extraordinarysunshineweaver.blog

Original Digital Art: “Future Earth” ©Martha Harris  See Martha’s Artistic Flarings@artisticflarings.blog

Ekphrastic Poetry · Healing · Original Digital Art · Poem · Poetry · Reiki · Writing

Rest in Your Being

 

Rest in your being.

Your light is ever shifting its gaze to wholeness

As moods can dim what’s inward 

To quarter light.

One cannot judge the size of the heart

From dawn to dusk.

You are your own moon rising and setting

Over the span of hours or days.

Time is relative to your path to insight as

Your moon waxes and wanes.

Heed not a dim light.

It will swell to fullness as a healed heart.

Dawn patiently greets a rising sun.

And sunsets greet a rising moon.

This is the rhythm of healing.

Shadows never linger, for insights shine.

Yet shadows create the spectrum of illumination,

Forming mandalas of awareness for you to study.

The wholeness of your light is rich in tone and chroma.

Your complexion is your moon.

This visage is vibrant and ever changing.

Fear not the face of your soul at dusk.

It is waking in that moment.

Rest in your spirit to await

The dawn of your knowing.

 

©Barbara Harris Leonhard  @extraordinarysunshineweaver.blog

Image: “Dawn of Knowing”, original digital art, ©Martha Harris. See Martha’s Artistic Flarings@artisticflarings.blog

Healing · Poem · Poetry · Reiki

Mother-Father God

Mother-Father God,
We gather here to bless
The birthing of a sacred place
As it grows from soil to sky.
We embrace Your Light
In each brick and wall,
As mortar for the soul
Of this blessed place.
May the foundation, erected on
Crystalline ground hold up
The solid frame of each floor
And cradle the heart of the home, and
May it be the cauldron of Joy
Sustaining all.
May each floor hold wonder
For life as it unfolds.
May each window open to awe
As each season passes through time
In its own glory.
May each wall protect and guard
As a mother’s arms would her babe.
May the roof shield from rain and storm,
Clothing the hearth.
May each residing soul find
Sanctuary in this temple.
May all who visit find healing
In heart of this hallowed dwelling.
May mercy and forgiveness
Grow a garden here
To nourish each spirit
And adorn the grounds.
And so it is,
And so let it be.
Amen. Amen. Amen.

©Barbara Harris Leonhard@extraordinarysunshineweaver.blog

Images: The construction of a new home of the Hensley-Crouch family: Dennis, Shannon, Robin, and Charly

Healing · Original Digital Art · Poem · Poetry · Quotes · Reiki

To Heal

To be mindful

is to heal.

Stay focused and decide

To be whole

Though critics say no.

Fear is drought

To the garden.

Let thoughts wander past

As breeze.

May you be robust,

lively, and flush,

Blooming to your prime

As rising sun

Heating the soil

For rain.

May you be the nourishment

Ministering to your heart.

You are the medicine, the cure,

The healer.

 

 

©2018 Barbara Harris Leonhard@extraordinarysunshineweaver.blog

Image: “Sands of Time” digital art ©Martha Harris See Martha’s Artistic Flarings @artisticflarings.blog

 

 

Healing · Poem · Poetry · Reiki

Shadow

Shadow

Shadow clings to me;

I, to the Light.

No angle to the sun

Will rid me of Shadow.

Shadow is tallest

At highest Light,

And dimmest

At highest Night.

 

Freedom from Shadow

Is an illusion.

She is always over my shoulder and

Hard to slap

When she constantly rebukes me

Into my tormented ears.

 

Evasive yet underfoot,

Like old gum

Stuck to my shoes

being dragged

Through mud and straw.

 

Even at night,

Shadow grips onto me.

My specter in lamp light,

How she looms across a wall

Watching me read,

And how she enfolds me as I sleep

With her cold arms.

 

Sleek, silky Sorceress,

No face,

Only form;

She is the outline of

The dark side of my soul,

The color of abyss,

The size of void.

Her breath reeks of

Cosmic dust.

 

She is my pesky hag,

My tyrant,

My saboteur,

My martyr,

My critic,

My blackmailer.

 

My constant companion

And biographer,

She has written the novels of all my lives,

The Akashic Scholar assigned to me at birth.

My secrets rest with Shadow;

She knows all my doubts, fears, trespasses, sins.

 

Shadow holds the causes

Of my discords and dis-ease.

My contender, she greedily obscures

That which I must discover,

My authentic selves

In all my lives.

 

If I uncover my truth,

She will lose me forever,

And she cannot bear to be alone.

Shadow has no shadow

To bear.

 

Still, she must give up my secrets

If I persist.

Though she is a wounded healer,

Shadow will never heal

Unless I do,

Unless I listen and turn to the Light

In such a way

That Shadow is standing

Next to me,

Not behind me,

My Sacred Sister,

Holding my hand.

 

My dear Shadow,

You can never abandon me,

Nor I you.

 

©2018 Barbara Harris Leonhard @extraordinarysunshineweaver.blog

Image: pixabay.com

Original Digital Art · Poem · Quotes · Reiki

Violet Flame

Violet Flame

Transmute

Transmute

With violet fire

All causes and cores

Not of God’s desire.

I am a being of cause alone.

The cause is love,

The sacred tone.

*Saint Germain

summitlighthouse.org

Digital Image “Heart Journeys” ©Martha Harris@artisticflarings.com